After a While

Thank goodness Blogspot auto-saves the entries that I type even when I accidentally try deleting them!  Here's what I had typed up:

Life has been pretty good lately.  I'm progressing in my job, I'm still in a wonderful relationship with Christina, I still and always love my family, and am pursuing God a little more actively.

Professional life:

The building my office is in will be torn down but before that happens, the school is giving us a new dive office.  We will be moving in October into the new space and I am very excited for the move.  The semester started up a week or so ago and it is the 3rd semester where I am the full-time Assistant Diving Safety Officer, 5th semester I've been an employee at the university, and it is the 6th time that I am being a part of this scientific diving course (the first time was as a student).  I continue to feel like a valuable employee to my employer, particularly by putting together computer-based modules with a lot of the academic information.  I have turned all of our dive theory lectures (which make up half of the semester - 24-28 hours worth of material) into online modules that the students can access any time they please.  I constantly ask for suggestions on what to change and how to make them better and have still gotten almost nothing negative back in return.  The best compliment was when a student admitted to wondering who UM hired to write and narrate the modules.  I was very flattered.

I spent two weeks working for Broadreach again on a new trip called Bonaire Advanced Scuba where we spent two weeks in Bonaire teaching Advanced and Rescue Diver certifications as well as several specialties.

Personal life:

I still do and always will love my family.  In looking back at previous posts, I am immensely ashamed to admit that I haven't said anything about the birth of my first niece Scarlett.  Liza gave birth on March 2nd to a beautiful baby girl.  Unfortunately I won't be able to see them tomorrow when Christina and I are flying through their city on our way up to Ohio to go to a college friend's wedding (maybe you all remember Matt), but I'm sure I'll see them another time.  We will see my parents, Matt and his new wife, and Richard and his new girlfriend.  Matt and Richard are two of the six Physics majors who graduated with me from Denison.  I have hardly seen them since graduation but have kept better contact with them than just about any other fellow grads.  It will be Christina's first time to Ohio and thus her first time seeing where I grew up.  I'ave been going to a community group through my church lately (you might call it a Bible study but it's not exactly) with some other guys about my age and it's been pretty good so far.  Details to come after I go more often.

Life:

Love it.

Christ is Risen!

Happy Easter everyone!!!!! Let's not forget why we celebrate! Because Jesus died and rose from the grave, we too may have eternal life with Him. If that's not enough to make your day, I'm not sure what will.

Sun peeking through storm clouds while rafting along Orange River, Namibia / S Africa border.

Getting Help

I did something out of the ordinary this weekend. I went to Fall Retreat with Campus Crusade, one of the Christian organizations on campus. The first of two most memorable moments was on the second night when all the guys separated from the girls (about 40 of us perhaps) and had some serious bonding time. The other moment I can't forget is the first night when everyone went out on the beach after the first session. There was a ton of socializing going on but at one point I decided to just get up and walk down the beach. Light pollution filled the sky and choked the stars but no amount of light could stop the cool refreshing breeze, warm sand beneath my feet, and soothing lapping of the waves. As I walked I started to pray, asking for help making up my mind about next year and beyond. It went something like this:

Lord, please allow me to find some sort of a research position with the University.

Well...as long as it's your will. Please let it be your will to have me find some sort of field work.

I mean, please let your will be to have me do something interesting in marine science. I mean, I am putting a lot of effort into it after all and it would be great to keep up with it and not have spent this semester in vain.

It was sometime around then that all of a sudden I nearly fell to my feet with an epiphany.

Do not worry about tomorrow.

I have never understood it to the level that I did that night. I had heard it before, I had said it before, and I even have it as a quote on my facebook profile (Matthew 6:31-34) but never before have I understood it so clearly. I expect you to see what I mean but don't imagine you'll “get it” as vividly as I did but that's okay. What it means is that I want God's will to be done. I'm not in control of my life: going to South Africa is a prime example. Because I'm not in control and because my main desire is to be used by God, there's not really much I can do in the way of stressing about my future. All of a sudden, my life became way easier and more fulfilling at the same time. The reason I can brag about this is that everyone can (and should) at least consider trying it out.  It's not a “hey look what I can do aren't I special?” but more of a “woah, this is awesome and you should totally try it!”

I'm still pursuing a variety of different options but my stress level is at exactly 0 and I'm loving it, not that it ever even reached 4 (unit-less and without a reference point just to keep you all guessing). Today while in the library I had the sudden urge to investigate research options online instead of working on a lab writeup or studying for tomorrow's test. I found some really cool projects that would benefit the environment, give me experience, and allow me to travel. What more could I want? It would be on a volunteer basis but as long as I'm paying for classes here, why not try to gain experience somewhere more fun and exotic? Some of the options include Alaska, Thailand, Belize, Antarctica, Thailand, South Africa, Australia, Fiji, etc.

In other random news, I have my ticket to see the Dalai Lama, my camera is being fixed by Canon in VA right now for free (warranties are great), and unfortunately since I chose not to pay the athletic fee, I don't get to go to the U Miami and Florida State U game on Saturday unless I suddenly decide it's worth 200 bucks.  Yeah right.

Every Little Thing Is Gonna Be Alright

I was 100% convinced a few years ago that I was to study abroad in Kenya. I started learning Swahili, researching the culture and history, and thinking of nothing but Kenya from the day I made the decision to go. A week before my flight I experienced one of the worst days of my life: Denison prohibited me from going based on a lack of political stability (the Dec 27 2007 elections turned violent). I reluctantly ended up in South Africa.

While there, a friend of mine invited me to attend an informational meeting nearby about a spring break trip to Mozambique. After a lot of thought, I decided to go on the trip. Since scuba diving was part of the trip, I decided to become certified.

While in Mozambique, I was presented with two options: either remain an open water diver and rarely dive the rest of my life or invest a ton more time and money to become an instructor, and make it back over the course of a year off after undergrad.

It's hard to believe that it was all without reason. Look what has stemmed from one of my worst days I can remember. I would not have visited Meg in Hawai'i or met all of her friends, would never have made it to the Philippines or met the Fajardos, Armand, Marin, Brett, Mark, Chris, Jay, Tomi, Maria, or the rest of the crew at Capt'n Gregg's, and never would have been to Indonesia or Singapore meeting the Weckerlings, or the dive crews at Buddha and Lutwala Dive. I would not have a one-way ticket to Australia and certainly wouldn't be lined up to work for Broadreach this summer.

It's hard to say one way or another, but if these things hadn't played out as they did, I might not have this yearning for a massive upheaval of societal restraints. Speaking of, I've received more feedback on that blog post than on any other; responses have run the gamut of encouraging, apprehensive, inquisitive, discouraging, curious, and fearful.

The feeling to temporarily sever ties from civilization is not new, but it has been occurring much more frequently and clearly over the past few months which is why I finally said something about it. I've pandered the idea in a hypothetical light until recently when I at last posed the question: what's holding me back? When this question could not be answered, my mind began to roll with the idea of actually doing it and it's been snowballing ever since, gaining momentum every day although I am still incredibly uncertain whether or not I will act upon the urge. Here are a few obstacles I have thus far recognized: not having enough camera batteries (you'll have to fight me and pry my camera from my hands if you think I should do an adventure of this degree without taking photos – it's the one piece of technology I insist upon), lack of support, lack of emergency contact, location (where is it legal to just plop down and live on the land anymore?), and lack of training.

Here's the thing: I have this spark right now and I recognize that it is but a spark; if I don't let it ignite, it will be extinguished and I will live the rest of my life wondering what could have happened. Like I've said, I don't know why I feel this way, I don't know where to go, I don't know for how long, I don't know how to do it, and I don't know what I expect to get out of it. All I know is that for some reason or other I have a serious urge to live for a while with no connection to the world as I know it.

I Have a Plan ... kind of.

My plan has yet to include securing housing and having a visa, but it does involve having plane tickets. As you can see from the map, I'll be in the Philippines from the 6th of August until I leave for Bali at the beginning of November.

I don't know a single word of the language, I don't have a place to stay, I have not figured out what to do for transportation once I arrive, there is not a single person there whom I've ever met, I don't know what the food is like, I am clueless about the culture, and I have no idea if I need any vaccinations or medication. I'm not just taking a little road trip vacation to Florida. I'm moving across the world to the Philippines completely on my own. If there has ever been a time in my life that I've been out of my comfort zone, this trip is going to blow it out of the water.

Am I excited? Absolutely. I'm ready to tackle whatever challenge comes my way and adapt to any situation.
Am I nervous? You bet I am. I'm closing my eyes, climbing to the edge of a cliff, and taking the biggest leap of faith of my life. This year is going to be amazing and exciting. I'm going to learn more than I ever expected about other parts of the world and come back with more stories than I'll be able to remember (thank you Blogger.com). However, it will not be without tremendous challenge.
In Him, all things are possible.

I Could Sing of Your Love Forever

It began to sink in a few weekends ago when I was making the morning drive up to the North Shore. It's so easy to see the beauty of God's creation on this island. From the mountains to the valleys. From the rivers to the sea. Everywhere I look I see life so beautiful that it sometimes takes my breath away. It is beauty I can't capture on film. Beauty that I can't describe in words. Beauty that I'm sure is taken for granted and overlooked every day. Beauty that is all part of God's creation. He is amazing.

I went to the weekly game of ultimate frisbee tonight and had a blast. My instructor class starts tomorrow - the whole reason I'm in Hawaii to begin with. We're going to go 9-4 in the classroom tomorrow, Thursday, and then a little bit shorter on Friday. No idea what we're going to cover but I only have 2 more pages of the 60 pages of worksheets to finish up before tomorrow morning. The manager at the shop called today and told me that she's going to try to get me a time slot next week to work in the shop! Hooray! Experience! I just hope I can remember all the little details of how to use the crazy computer system. Oh, last thing to add. A permanent state-wide cell phone ban begins tomorrow. No cell phones while driving anymore. Now I need to finish my last reading/worksheet filling and get some sleep. It's so hot here day and night. Overnight lows are mid-upper 70s with over 70% humidity.